A question that often comes up in my coaching sessions and that I’ve struggled with myself for a long time (basically, throughout my entire career… ): How can you be your authentic self at work?
In my professional journey, I discovered that my natural inclination is to please and support others. Conflict situations usually make me uncomfortable, leading me to avoid them altogether. Consequently, I hesitated in meetings, refrained from voicing my genuine opinions, and often agreed to things I wasn’t truly supportive of. I admired colleagues who spoke up, fueled healthy debates, while an internal voice urged me to be discrete, supportive, humble, and obedient. Because I thought that as such, people would like me, my performance would be evaluated positively, and I would grow my career. And actually it did – my strategy seemed to work!
Comes the moment, now 4 years ago, when I started up my own business, I no longer had a boss. I no longer had performance reviews. I no longer felt the need to comply with the desired company culture and ideal behaviours. This newfound freedom left me feeling a bit lost. I continued my old ways until I realized that clients were paying me not to conform but to be authentic – to voice concerns, hold up mirrors, and identify organizational blind spots.
Gradually, I let go of the filters, no longer played a role and stopped adjusting to internal politics. I started being myself at work – vulnerable, enthusiastic and giving my very best to the client. This meant speaking up in meetings, calling things out, but always in my own style – supportive, non-aggressive and diplomatic, yet with a clear message and no hidden agenda.
Here lies the true win-win: I felt liberated, took a lot of satisfaction from my work, and clients were more than happy with my contributions.
Regardless of gender or style biases – the best version of yourself is you! Don’t pretend to be someone else – it doesn’t make sense.
So what if you behaved as if there were no boss to evaluate you? What would you do different versus today? Would you speak up more – would you be more bold? If the answer is yes, consider making those changes now, and see what it brings you. For me it definitely made a huge difference in feeling engaged, empowered and getting more satisfaction from what I do.
